This is an old fic that I had finished for a while now, so I thought that I'd post it up here. I'm not much of a writer really, and this particular story I've been working on for a year I think, so my original ideas may have been lost among the tons of editing. It's not complete, and when I finally finish the final scene of the second part I'll post it here too.  Warning: This fic ended up a bit longer than anticipated.  :)

By the way, how's everyone on LJ been? It feels like I've been away so long even though it hasn't been a month yet. I missed you guys.  :)

Title: Dreamer
Fandom: Final Fantasy VIII
Pairing: Squall/Rinoa
Genre: Romance, Angst
Disclaimer: I don't own FFVIII, and I used several direct quotes from the game script.
Summary: He was afraid to ponder further, cautious that what he was to imagine would be the truth. For if this foreign land wasn' the home he'd held onto so dearly, then simply he was in the wrong place. In the wrong era, in the wrong lifetime, in the wrong time.
 

( ~.~ )

Its been a while hasn't it? Well I'm glad to say that I've made a full recovery since my last post and that no one else in the family has got the bug either. My two best friends who got the gastro virus after me (but not from me) have all recovered too so it looks like the sickness season has finally left us.

The beginning of June has been cold but I'm looking forward to these things: baking special chocolate cookies and other goodies for silverymare 's upcoming birthday, choosing my year 11 classes and Supanova near the end of this month.  :)

I have no idea of what courses I'll take, and now that I think about them there aren't too many that I'd like out of 50. Also this week I have a tournament coming up; I reckon I'm only half prepared for it. I'll try the singles but I doubt I'll get into the semi-finals, mainly its the doubles and mixed that I'm concerned about.

I've finally chosen a cosplay outfit for Supanova and I'm excited that I'll be the one making it (with mother's help, of course). The character is Dagger from Final Fantasy IX, aka. the girl in my icon. I've long loved that game despite it being quite old now, and I've always wanted to cosplay one of its characters. I wasn't sure that I wanted to be wearing bright orange overalls everywhere, but I'm adding her white and red coat from the beginning of the game to cover it. Some of you may recognise this as the traditional white mage hood XD. I love the look of the coat and if it were done well I'd wear it everywhere~

Ugh, I've been sick since Saturday. The first night had me tossing and turning for hours in constant stomach pain and feeling waves of nausea and exhaustion. I did throw up eventually and the next day I felt slightly better but still very weak. The same went for Monday and so I didn't go to school from dizziness and overwhelming waves of exhaustion the moment I stood up from my bed. Yesterday I woke up with a gurgling stomach; most likely from eating only very small proportions of meals through the three days, but after eating a small slice of a roll I felt sick. I went to school but figured I couldn't contain the nausea and got sent home. There I slept like a log for many hours, getting up only to feel dizzy, nausea, exhaustion and a general terrible feeling when one is sick.

Today is much better than yesterday, but I can't say that I'll be okay tomorrow. I've got work to catch up on from being sick on assessment week, but I can't concentrate when looking at trigonometry equations and studying economics. I shouldn't even be on the computer but I can't help it. I haven't been able to eat anything properly without imagining it coming back out again. I'm sick of being sick.  :( 

Yesterday I made 157 sugar cookies, originally meant to be a strawberry cake for me cousin's birthday, but yummy nonetheless~  I've been reading through Bakerella and such way too much nowadays ^^'.

I've been wanting some new music to listen to so I was wondering if my f-list could help me out a little? :D Don't worry, it'll be fun. Tell me all your favourite songs; I don't care if they're English or not, rock, pop, ballad or instrumental. I'm sure you all have great music taste, and I'm welcoming pretty much anything right now. Thanks~!

On my way back from school yesterday I decided to continue walking past my house and to the park nearby. What I realised from that walk is that there are parts of my memory that I've lost. Even now I cannot recall what happened in 2005 or 2004, when my family experienced a very bad time. It hurts my mind to try think about it because I've forgotten the details. I suppose its good that I don't remember the pain, but I want to know because its a part of me.

My rivercruise was on Wednesday and me and a friend went to our friend's house after school. The visit was fun but when we got to the docked boat we discovered that it was colder than we anticipated. And also that all the other girls there were wearing only tight shiny black dresses up to their butts. I felt sorry for them and it wasn't surprising that a number of them were absent the next day from a possible cold. The cruise itself was quite boring; too many people, too little space, too little air. I spent most of the time looking out at the view and photographing everyone else.

I'd like to throw 'caution to the wind' and wake up each day without a plan, but I find that kind of lifestyle wouldn't last me very long. Even though being spontaneous is fun, I'll always return to my original schedule because its my default. 

Its two days until the holidays, but it definitely doesn't seem like it at all. It felt as if I blinked and suddenly one school term was finished. My brain is still telling me it's third week.  :P I'm not even sure that I want to entertain the idea of year 11 course selections yet. Everything is moving so...fast.

I've been stressing about the Chinese song that I'm performing for the Multicultural Festival. I don't blame my friends though I really feel like it; they've never done singing performances before while I've had vocal lessons for about 5-6 years on and off. I guess it's just natural since we're in a group. I just wish that next time they were more organised  :). The performance is tomorrow, but I think everything's going to be fine now.

I've got a batch of icons, the first I've ever made, but I won't post them yet. They're made on PaintShop Pro so they aren't the best, but I've tried  :D.

This is a bit old but still worth it; there is a petition for a Final Fantasy IX Remake and since a lot of my f-list like FF so, why not. There's more information inside, and yes the numbers are low, but each vote is important so join in if you like the idea.

( She was with us even after she left... )

Goodnight everyone. ;)

I think I've been browsing through bakebakebake way too much for my own good; I'm now completely convinced that I should bake a cake a day.  >.<  But for now I'm doing a collection of my past cooking experiences, good and bad. I've never really done that much cooking, even though I always say I want to, but now I really want to get into it. Its surprisingly really fun and fulfilling~

Going to a two-day tournament tomorrow. It's with the general group of people I always play with, so its not different. I'm finding it a bit hard to get motivated, but I know it'll be good practice for my doubles with Yvonne. Last week we were taught a new doubles format and we were struggling at first, but now we've kinda got the hang on it, by just. If we can manage that, we can really play well.   :)

I cannot get over this site; I'm sure quite a few have seen this but I'll put this up for an educational lesson: thisiswhyyourefat.com/ I swear it gets even worse when you read the ingredients list.... ugh.

At school there is going to be a Multicultural Festival on through Multicultural Week and somehow I got very much involved in it. Last year inspired me to be involved due to the interesting cultural performances (including a Japanese rock song :D). Now its ended up that half of my group is performing a dance to a popular Korean song and the rest of them, including me, will be performing a popular Chinese song.

Have I ever mentioned that I was asian? Well yes, I may be but I don't speak Chinese except for a few words here and there of my family's dialect.

I had to intensely study the words and how to say them, it gave me a headache  :( . I'm also not sure how I feel about performing this song in my bad Chinese among the 1700 people of my school; and also a large amount of them understanding the language....gulp. I haven't done singing performances for a while.  ^^' 

Comment to this post and I will give you 5 subjects/things I associate you with. Then post this in your LJ and elaborate on the subjects given.

I haven't done memes for a while, well actually, purposefully putting it off. This one's from wheatear, and pretty accurate.


( The art of losing isn't hard to master... )

The 1st of March is my birthday, and even though the day is inching closer with every minute I don't feel any different. Ever since I was about 12 I stopped having birthday parties because they were too troublesome; I guess you could call me somewhat anti-social. Though I still enjoy the very pretty birthday cake with my close family. Normally the day will be filled with enjoyable events; making pizzas, going to watch movies, eating out for dinner etc. My friends keep bugging me about what I want but I tell them all the same thing because I don't really know myself. Birthdays are strange for me.

Its like the time when I reflect on the year that I've just passed; the ups and downs, and it puts me in a very dreamy mode. I don't really want a big fuss made. Is it just me or does anyone else feel a bit sad when they get older; that maybe there were things in that year that they should have done, and now won't be able to anymore? Sometimes that how I see it. (not meant to be depressive at all)  :)

I'd just realised that I didn't summarize my holiday list, though I can already tell not much has been done:


( Here we go again. )

Argh school is back ^^;. How did I let time pass so fast? Two days ago was Wai, then it was the beginning of year 10 and sweltering days at school. And some things have changed; the area in which my friends and I used to sit at had its tree cut down and removed, which makes it completely uninhabitable in summer for there is zero shade at all =(.

I have requested to change my classes because there's no way I'm doing media when I haven't even the slightest idea of how to hold a camera, let alone an interest for it. I thought it was going to be a different sort of thing, but now I know. Please let it not be too late to change...

But besides the class I'm happy with the rest of my timetable; I'm finally going to have all my classes with people I know! What a relief ^^.

Also loving the new moodtheme from yuffie_kisaragi ><. Thanks so much~!

We went to Wai-con today at the Perth Convention Centre and it was a blast. I was in cosplay as Older Ema from Phoenix Wright and sis went as Ryoma from Prince of Tennis. So happy because its my first time cosplaying~!

( More of the details... )

Hehe... since I got my new phone yesterday I haven't been able to stop flipping out the keyboard ><. This is technically my Christmas present, but because it was out of stock for so long its taken so long to purchase. I love the design, so sleek, and I just LOVE flip phones~!

After buying it I realised it came in blue (omg that would be the most awesome phone~!!) but I couldn't be bothered going back to swap it ^^;. Red is good too.

I got to stop flipping it, it might break before the week's over!

Ah, Nodame LOVE. I've been obsessed with Nodame Cantabile drama/anime these few weeks, its just unbelievably addictive. ><

Along with finding a site that houses many more dramas that I'd never heard of, I'm been busy in front of the computer recently. Lets see, I've finished all Cantabile (that its up to), and now watching Goong. Not the most thrilling drama, quite predictable and average, but I still feel addicted to finishing the series. However the main character (wow I've already forgotten her name) annoys me slightly, due to her crying and whining. I went on to read the manga while waiting for my internet download to reload, and I'm glad to say that she doesn't annoy me half as much.

A part of me is slightly sick of doing this everyday, but there seems like no other alternative. I barely get out of this chair, let alone get out of the house. Badminton is regular, but on the days I don't have them, there doesn't seem like anything to do. Though I'm sure I'll find something eventually.

Planning to go out tomorrow, if only we can agree on somewhere to go... ^^'

....and I still can't stop staring at my icon O.o.

And now the holidays have come. Though I hadn't truly realised it (which is quite stupid I must admit) that I'm going to year 10 next year. Things won't become too difficult, but I'll have to deal with new things, new people. Not to mention the compulsory 20-hours community service I've been given, though somehow I'm looking forward to that too. ^^

Got my semester report today, along with the year book and state SOSE & Science testing results. I can't believe my science is below the average on the state testing. I'm a little worried I must admit, but I hope its not too much of a problem. I got A's in all subjects except Art scholarship. Kinda saw that one coming though.

I felt slightly sad leaving school today; I thought I'd be ecstatic but I'm numb. Half of my friends have all left for overseas and their absence has been felt my the rest of us. I probably won't see these people until next year. 

I've got so much to do on this holidays ^^. First off however, I'll sleep in until 12 in the afternoon. That should be good.

I seriously can't wait til the holidays. I feel so tired of this year, I don't know why, but I really want a break. I guess its the repetition of my classes, and because there never seems to be anything new happening. I really need to get out more lol. Tomorrow is my excursion so I don't consider that a 'school day', so excluding that and the weekend, I've only got 4 days left. Though, I've yet to buy my family's Christmas presents ^^. I really don't want to 'forget' again, and plus they deserve something.
It's this time of year and I've got to make a list of things to do in the holidays again (but I really do love making lists anyway):

( Here comes the list... )

 

Today hasn't been the best day ever. I know I haven't got the right to complain, but its just that I feel this is the first time that I've struggled in my schoolwork. And I mean actually struggle.

I couldn't remember the material for my test. This is the first time its happened so I was freaking out a bit; normally it all comes to me in the end. I studied all last night, along with practicing my violin which I haven't willingly done like, ever. My fingers have new blisters and I was furious at my crappy skills so I had to have a cool down. Ended up struggling over trinomial equations with my sister, and was coughing all night long. Can you tell that I haven't had any sleep the past few days?

Yeah, but it hasn't all been that bad. I saw my old year 6 teacher today, Mr O we called him for short. He was exactly the way I always remembered him; white haired, sense of humor. Even after three years it's never changed. We were just talking about the people he saw mucking around next to the primary school, as if we were old friends. Its so sad, I haven't been able to visit Burrendah for so long.

Besides that, things have been pretty good since I came back. There's was this new ranking system for national players, and so I was ranked 6th out of Australia in my age group. Which is, unfortunately, one massive lie. If anything, I was ranked 13th or 14th. The only reason I'm up so high is because I've played in a state tournament and national tournament while everyone just has one or the other.

So I'm back, finally ^^. Surprisingly enough I'm not exhausted, and I'm going to play more badminton today for 7 straight days. Must have been because of all the massages I've had from Samuel... but don't worry, all this will be explained in due time. I will try my best to recall all that has happened:

( Beware a massive cut inside. )

This is it. My suitcase is packed. I'm leaving in 4 hours. Today is the day.

I'm going to Melbourne today.

God, I hope I don't screw this up big time. But anyway, guess I'll see you all in a weeks time. ^^